Friday, September 19, 2008

Born With A Heart Of Steel




Once upon a time i worked at a Punk-Rock Record store near my house. I was sitting behind the counter going about my business when a young naive kid walked in and happened to notice behind the Manowar 'Kings of Metal' on the back wall for sale. The naive little shit had the audacity to tell me how much Manowar sucks and how they are a huge joke. The kid obviously had no idea he was talking to the only Manowar fan that worked in the store. So i looked him directly in the eye and sad "What the Fuck did you just say?" as the young'n sat there with a stupefied look on his face muttering something and trying to stand by his opinion, i quickly proclaimed that Manowar rules and is far better then any shitty band he was wearing on his vest(i can say this truthfully because this kid was wearing a Balzac backpatch). I countinued to verbally assault this poor kid by saying "Other bands play , Manowar kills!" basically telling him"my dad could beat up your dad" which i believe Manowar would stand by. All the kid could say in response was "uh, uh, i like IcedEarth." i quickly shot him down with a "Fuck that shit, that band fuckin sucks!"(i don't really ever recall hearing that band, but i was out for blood). It must have looked odd with this kid cowering to a crusty with a shaved head and a bright red pissed off look in his face. I feel bad for the kid, in a way.

Any who i love Manowar their brand of over the top cheesy power metal takes the cake and continues to get better with every album. It might be my guilt pleasure, but i don't feel so guilty. Their Machismo makes me weak in the knees. I will be the first to state Manowar is a lot like heavy metal show tunes, and i wouldn't have them any other way. I know for a fact that if JoeyDemiao were to see me sitting hear eating soy strawberry yogurt with granola he would call me a fag, and then ride off into the sunset with a blond stripper on the back of his "Horse of Steel". This is their 1988 album entitled 'Kings of Metal' this is the turning point for the band many claim this to either be were they sold out or were they got better i agree with the latter. Its so epic, manly and well Broadway. They have lyrics which include the prase "I ride a comet" and Way your sword stay wet, like a young girl in her prime"...Manowar don't fuck around! So if you like your metal full misogynistic closet cases this is the album for you. Besides this is the loudest band in the world according to Guinness Book of World Records, at least they used to be.

Hail And Kill!

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

MANOWAR what can you really say about one of the toughest bands in the world??? the first time i heard MANOWAR i didnt care too much for them but after listening to them over and over and over (thanks col) i grew very fond of them and crave their music from time to time.... der der great choice

love ya bunches

Anonymous said...

epic, truly epic!!

paris said...

I never really wanted to tell anyone how much I liked "Into Glory Ride." When they played at L'Amour in Brooklyn, I snuck out of the house in the burbs on a school night and went to see them slay (oh, brave 16-year old). A little secret pleasure.

Now I find that Manowar defenses are rampant in the blogosphere. Metal Inquisition backs them ("SO metal, they deny requests for friends in MySpace"), and Erich at Good Bad Music does, too (he writes, "This is the most courageous of posts! It takes a heart of steel and blood of fire to speak out the truth. The first four Manowar albums, the first demo and this 12″ are godlike.") So, I can finally come out.

Really, I only would listen to Into Glory Ride. Who knows how Kings of Metal will take? Will it take at all, 24 years - and a profound lack of interest in man-thongs and fur - later?

SvartStøy said...

Thanks craig(first anomymos) ya i was iffy on them as well at fist but joyous laughter soon turned into a passionate love of Metal. And Thank you to Paris, it takes a real man to admit he loves manowar.

Nick said...

never got why anybody like them.

hahahaha! i think i know who you were talking about with the Balzac patch, by chance, was he wearing a "Night of the Living Dead" hat?
if so, that guy does have pretty good taste in music.

these guys are definetly on my short list of "BANDS I HATE"...

this maybe the first time i don't end my comment with "GREAT POST"

I DEMAND MORE RARE PUNK!!!!!
hahhaha

SvartStøy said...

ya nick i believe he was wearing a night of the living dead hat, and i will admit he did eventually end up have decent taste in music, he just didn't have it at that point in time.

paris said...

Ok, later verdict, I don't much like this album. "Blood of the Kings" has a nice "ode to the early tunes" kind of flavor. But the rest is a pass. I just gotta get me "Into Glory Ride" and be done with it. Nostalgia can go a long way!

Gal said...

Hey man sorry i'm just repeating you now, I've just saw your comment, I like your blog :) I'm adding you to our links as well

Anonymous said...

Manowar?
you got no balls!
ph

SvartStøy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
SvartStøy said...

Thank Odin Manowar has enough balls for the two of us.

chrisc said...

Manowar never did for me.i think it had to do with their stupid image,all macho posturing and well-oiled biceps.i just couldn't get it.nevertheless i always liked several of their songs.i mean,you just can't go wrong with "bridge of death"!but i am still not (and probably will never be) able to understand the glory of Manowar.

billias said...

i think this the last "listenable" album by manowar. it was one of my favorite tapes.memorized anything it had on it (lyrics, e.t.c)
but then came a tidal wave of thrash stuff and washed that all away.
but i can bare the older ones...

SvartStøy said...

Honestly, i think this is the album were they started getting great, everything prior (at least from the last time i listened to it years ago)just sounded incomplete to me. I think they have only gotten better

Anonymous said...

Strangely enough, my metal evolution started with thrash, then death, then black metal. I've come full circle back to trad metal, and I'm a huge fan of these guys. Manowar is really cornball at times, but their music really moves me... "Kings of Metal" is ace!!!